|
2004-03-22 - 10:10 p.m. Equal time for the uterus That ought to be enough fair warning for guys, squeamish people who don't want to read about cramps, or anyone else who wants nothing to do with this entry. No, this will have nothing to do with stuttering. I mentioned before that all mine generally says is OW once in a while. Well I guess it was saving up, because dear Lord, was it talkative today. Truthfully, though, it had been trying the OW thing for a day now, and I basically was like yeah yeah, I know, I'll get up and get you some Advil in a minute, I just have to do this one more thing. Which is funny, because generally I'm against pain. But occasionally my brain gets tired or stupid or is trying to impress someone or something, and it says, no no, the pain isn't that bad yet, let's do THIS first before we take care of it. And I listen. Well, this time the brain getting stupid has coincided with the uterus getting in a rush. Every so often it says to itself, "You know what, I'm sick and tired of this thing lasting five days. Let's get it over with NOW." And it forgets that doing that HURTS. So yesterday it was saying, "Ow." Pause. "Ow." Pause. "Excuse me out there, but OW." Eventually I got it some Advil and it quieted down. Today it's just not happy with me at all. "Ow." Nothing. "Excuse me, OW." Yeah yeah, in a minute. "YO out there, freakin OW." It gets all street on me when it's upset. But it didn't scare me. I said in a minute. So finally I got the ultimatum. "All right, LISTEN," it said. "If you don't get me some freakin Advil, RIGHT freakin NOW, and I'm not talking one or two, I'm talking SERIOUS Advil here, I swear to God I'm gonna twist myself into a knot and I'm gonna take out every other internal organ within reach, and I can reach a lot of 'em. You know that liver? It's a goner. That pancreas you like so much? Bye bye. You read me? Advil, NOW, or one of these kidneys gets it." So I got it some Advil and it calmed down again. Honestly. It brings these situations on itself. Okay. That's all the internal organ conversation transcript for a while. Everybody else can come back. my mood - |
|
|
Recent ramblings: |
<==